Dealing with parental expectations is a tricky thing.

Do you want to know a unique commonality that almost all of the most elite athletes have in their lives?

Everyone needs someone to support and challenge them on their path to success. This person can be a mentor, coach, parent, or role model.

Someone who knows the athlete well and has spent a lot of time with them during their development. For most youth athletes, this figure takes the role of their parents.

Parents typically provide guidance because they want to help their athletes improve. 

However, their efforts can sometimes lead to stress, anxiety, and high expectations. These pressures can become overwhelming for the athlete.

It’s like a tightrope walk that can throw you off balance. The fear of disappointing your parents or not living up to their expectations can gnaw at you.

All that stress can drag you down and eat away at your game. The good news is there is a path forward. You can learn to manage those high expectations and knock them out of the park in every game. That’s what champions do, and that’s what you can do too.

The Effects of High Parental Expectations

Dealing with high expectations in sports can drag you down, no matter where they come from? Be it your own or parental expectations, coach, or peers, it can impact your game and mental well-being.

The constant pressure of underdelivering on expectations can make you feel like a failure or fraud. And nobody wants to be a failure, right?

It’s tough when the heat is on – not only can it affect your performance, but it can also take a toll on your mental health.

Falling short of expectations leads to feelings of worthlessness and impostor syndrome that we can’t let take over.

Reject the idea of ‘not good enough’ immediately, as it can negatively impact us in multiple ways.

It hits the hardest when those high expectations come from the people we want to impress most – our parents. But hey, we can’t always live up to their ideals.

It’s natural to feel affected when not meeting their standards, yet it’s crucial to know that it’s okay if we stumble.

All the pressure to perform can even reflect in our output on the field or court- lowering our performance.

Why?

It’s easy: Stress, anxiety, fear of failure, and disappointing others make you doubt yourself.

This leads to hesitation instead of confidence due to excessive thoughts and concern about parental opinions.

 Trying to make your parents happy is understandable, and nothing is wrong with it.

But, it’s important the desire for approval doesn’t hinder your journey towards freedom from the constant need for their validation.

 Constantly seeking validation can harm your performance and even your love for the sport, which is never a good thing!.

How To Manage Your Parents’ Expectations

Mastering the art of handling parental pressure healthily is essential for long-term success and mental well-being.

Believe it or not, it is a mental skill that can directly enhance your performance.

Let’s turn that pressure into a power move, shall we? Here is how.

Learn to Set Your Own Objectives

Are you setting your objectives yourself, or are your parents or coach setting them for you?

Setting clear targets to measure your performance is crucial to your success.

These objectives should outline the key aspects to focus on for the day, week, month, etc.

 It’s important to set goals you can control and measure. Don’t worry about things you can’t control.

Your objectives should always be S.M.A.R.T.:

• Specific
• Measurable
• Achievable
• Realistic
• Timely

In other words, set specific goals that precisely state what you wish to change and improve.

Make sure your progress is measurable, so you can quickly build momentum

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Focus on achievable goals, so success is within reach. Make your goals realistic but challenging.

S.M.A.R.T. objectives will empower you to take control and feel accomplished on your road to success.

Adopt a Growth Mindset

What you think about yourself will define who you are and how you perform during a game or practice.

Your self-image has a direct impact on your game or practice performance. It’s that simple!

Negative thoughts will feed themselves and spiral out of control. Don’t let negative thoughts hurt your winning attitude.

Negative thoughts feed your self-talk:

• I missed it again, I’m useless
• I played so badly today
• I am lazy I do not work hard enough
• They will not be happy

The above adds up to your parents’ high expectations and creates more pressure.

No one can come back to a better performance if negativity feeds their mind.

 The mind is a powerful thing!

If we can train our thoughts to believe improvement is always possible, then better performance and growth are inevitable!

 This is what we call having a growth mindset.

• I trust my skills and hard work, I can do this
• I missed it, no big deal. I shake it off. I move on. I get this
• My parents and coach are here for me

By having positive thoughts, we can talk to ourselves in a way that improves our mood. This positive self-talk also gives us the strength to overcome any obstacle that comes our way.

Remember that positivity can work wonders on our self-talk, imparting a much-needed dose of optimism to our lives.

How to Deal With Feedback Like a Champion

Are parental expectations leaving you feeling overwhelmed and underappreciated?

Perhaps a comment after a practice or game is getting you down. But what if it didn’t have to be that way?

Here’s the truth, the biggest hurdle in dealing with high parental expectations is how you react to them.

Let’s be real; your interpretation is a large part of the issue.

Don’t worry! There’s a solution. Instead of feeling defeated, look at things in a new light and watch how your perspective changes.

Practicing reframing can help you a great deal. It starts with you viewing things differently.

I’m not suggesting it is easy to do. It requires consistent practice to train your mind.

Most parents want their kids to succeed and be happy in life. In most cases, it’s all out of pure love and positivity, even if it seems a little odd and the comment delivery is a little off.

 They’re definitely coming from a place of love.

The big secret is to become more relaxed with feedback in general and be able to identify and recognize the positive in what you hear, even if it requires you some effort to analyze a bit.

Reframing is a technique to see feedback and criticism positively. It helps you grow in all areas of life, like school and work, not just sports.

Your Takeaways

To wrap up this blog post, it is clear that parental expectations in sports can be overwhelming.

Exceeding their expectations and doing the “right” thing can leave you feeling like you are walking a tightrope. The ability to handle parental pressure is a vital ingredient to going far in pursuing any passion or career.

Using the tips outlined in this post, you can manage that pressure and tension positively and constructively.

You’ll find that with each success, your confidence and self-image will skyrocket.

It may take patience, practice, and regular reinforcement of these methods before you truly master the art of sports psychology.

However, with consistency comes great rewards; you will be more balanced, focused, and stronger than ever!

We want to hear from you: has this post inspired or changed your thoughts about battling parental pressure?

Are there other techniques that have helped you along your journey? Let us know what you think in the comments below, or reach out to our team.